Let’s begin: what do you actually know about oral sex? In popular culture, everyone is an expert in giving head, but things get complicated when it comes to reality. It turns out that more than 60% of men get lost when it comes to orally pleasing a girl. To close this oral gap, Flure experts came up with a handful of recommendations about how to go down on a girl to prove that there is never too much knowledge when it comes to sex.
Ask first
Clear communication is key to great experiences. Start by asking if she enjoys receiving oral sex, and find out what she particularly likes about it. This conversation helps set boundaries, build trust, and creates a comfortable atmosphere where she can freely share her preferences. By asking, you eliminate the need for assumptions, allowing both of you to focus on creating a mutually enjoyable experience.
Clit is the spot
The clitoris is often the main area of focus, as it contains thousands of nerve endings. Start here, applying gentle pressure and paying attention to her responses. Subtle changes in her breathing, movements, or vocal cues will let you know if she’s enjoying it. This attentiveness is key—responding to her reactions helps ensure she feels good and in tune with the rhythm of your touch.
Move your tongue around it
A common technique is to slowly move your tongue around the clitoris to explore what feels best for her. Some people enjoy “tracing the alphabet” or drawing gentle patterns with the tongue. Begin with soft, steady strokes, adjusting to her reactions. Each movement offers different sensations, so take your time to find the ones that bring her the most pleasure.
Try sucking on it
Alternating between strokes, try softly sucking or kissing the clitoris to enhance the sensation. Gentle suction can provide a pleasurable change in intensity, allowing her to experience different layers of stimulation. Be attentive to her reactions—some people love the added pressure, while others may prefer lighter touches. This approach can bring a unique dimension to the experience, enhancing arousal and intimacy.
Find the rhythm
Finding the right rhythm is essential to creating a comfortable and enjoyable experience. Too fast can feel overwhelming, while too slow may not be stimulating enough. Once you find a speed she seems to enjoy, stay consistent with it. Pay attention to any cues she gives, such as her breathing pattern or how her body responds, and adjust as needed to keep her relaxed and fully immersed.
Keep the tempo
Once you’ve found a rhythm she likes, maintain it for a steady build-up. Frequent changes in speed or technique can disrupt the flow and make it difficult for her to stay focused. A steady, consistent pace allows her to fully relax into the moment, enhancing her pleasure. Consistency here can be the key to creating a deeply enjoyable experience.
Spread the labia
Don't hesitate to gently spread her labia for better access and to enhance her sensations. This position allows her to feel your touch with greater intensity and provides you with a clearer focus on her most sensitive areas. Exploring in this way shows confidence and can add to her comfort, helping to elevate the intimacy of the moment.
Use fingers
Incorporating your fingers can add new layers of pleasure. Gently inserting a finger or two can intensify the experience, especially when done in sync with your oral movements. Many people enjoy the combined sensation, and it also gives you the option to switch things up by kissing her on the lips while continuing the pleasure. Make sure to communicate and watch her reactions to know what feels best.
Play with her nipples
Some people enjoy nipple stimulation, which can heighten arousal and even lead to orgasm. While giving oral, gently touch, squeeze, or tease her nipples to add extra stimulation. This combination of sensations can be incredibly pleasurable, as it brings her attention to different areas of her body, enhancing the overall experience and deepening her sense of connection.
Penetrate her with your tongue
For an added thrill, try gently penetrating her with your tongue. While this typically won’t provide the same intensity as clitoral stimulation, many people enjoy the variation and sensation it brings. It adds a new level of excitement and intimacy, offering a way to switch up your techniques and keep things interesting.
Play with her butt (if she wants it)
If she's interested, light anal play can add a unique dimension to the experience. This type of stimulation during oral can be an exciting addition for some, and it’s ideal to check in with her beforehand. With open communication and trust, this can serve as a fun, exploratory part of foreplay that adds to the intimacy and overall experience.
Use toys
Introducing toys can bring creativity and variety to your intimate moments. There are plenty of options, from vibrators to nipple stimulators, that can amplify the experience. Experimenting with different types, like butt plugs, beads, or textured vibrators, can make oral sex more thrilling. Toys can be a playful addition, allowing you both to explore new sensations and discover what feels best together.
Try different positions
Switching positions during oral sex can create fresh sensations and keep things exciting. Experiment with different angles and body placements to see what feels best for both of you. New positions can bring a different energy to your time together, enhancing intimacy and helping you connect in new, exciting ways.
How to receive oral sex if you have a vagina
Receiving oral sex can be an incredible experience, especially if you're able to communicate and fully relax. Here are some ways to get what you want and feel as comfortable as possible.
1. Set the mood
Creating a comfortable, relaxed environment can help you let go and enjoy. Dim lighting, soft music, or a cozy setting can make a difference. Whether it's playful or romantic, setting the tone will help both of you feel at ease and connected.
A comfortable setting can make all the difference in helping you feel fully relaxed and open to new experiences.
2. Communicate your desires
If you know what you like, don’t be afraid to say so. Express what feels best for you or let them know what to try. Clear, open communication is essential, and it can also be a huge turn-on.
3. Guide them gently
If something feels amazing, let them know by gently guiding them with your words or hands. A subtle nudge or verbal cue like "right there" or "a little slower" can make it easier for your partner to understand what you enjoy.
4. Relax and focus on your breathing
The more relaxed you are, the more you’ll enjoy the sensations. Focusing on your breathing can help keep you present and grounded. Take slow, deep breaths to release any tension in your body and let yourself fully enjoy.
Slow, deep breaths can help you feel more present, intensifying pleasure and making the experience more fulfilling.
5. Don’t be afraid to receive fully
It’s common to worry about taking too long, but know that your partner likely wants you to enjoy yourself fully. Let go of any pressure to rush things; this is your moment to receive pleasure. Take your time and embrace the experience.
6. Feel free to add a toy if it enhances the experience
If using a vibrator or other toy is part of what helps you reach pleasure, bring it in! Some people find that adding a small vibrator on the clitoris or using another type of toy can make oral sex even more enjoyable.
7. Experiment with different positions
Trying new positions can bring different sensations and change the experience. You might find that some positions feel better or are more comfortable for you. Being on your back, sitting up, or even standing can create new and exciting sensations.
8. Express gratitude and affection
A simple "thank you" or affectionate gesture afterward can go a long way. Showing appreciation strengthens the connection and makes future experiences more rewarding.
Gratitude and affection after an intimate experience build a stronger bond, making each moment together more meaningful.
How to give oral sex to a woman safely
1. Communicate and establish consent
Before engaging in any sexual activity, clear communication and enthusiastic consent are essential. Make sure both you and your partner are comfortable and excited to engage in oral sex. Discuss any boundaries or preferences beforehand to ensure a safe, enjoyable experience.
Open communication about desires and boundaries ensures both partners feel respected and comfortable.
2. Practice good hygiene
Good hygiene is crucial for both partners. Ensure that both you and your partner are clean before engaging in oral sex. This helps to prevent the spread of bacteria and makes the experience more comfortable for both of you. For women, this means washing the vaginal area and for men, ensuring their genitals are clean as well.
3. Use protection (like dental dams)
Using protection during oral sex can help reduce the risk of sexually transmitted infections (STIs). Dental dams, which are thin sheets of latex or polyurethane, can be placed over the vulva to prevent direct contact with bodily fluids. Condoms can also be used on the penis if performing oral sex on a man.
Using dental dams or condoms during oral sex reduces the risk of STIs and provides a safer experience for both partners.
4. Be aware of STI risks
Oral sex is a lower-risk activity compared to vaginal or anal sex, but it’s not without risks. STIs like herpes, gonorrhea, chlamydia, syphilis, and human papillomavirus (HPV) can be transmitted through oral-genital contact. Open sores, cuts, or lesions can increase the likelihood of transmission, so it’s important to be cautious if either partner has visible symptoms.
STIs can be transmitted through oral sex, so it’s vital to be aware of your partner’s sexual health and take precautions.
5. Get tested regularly and share medical reports
For added safety, it's crucial to regularly get tested for STIs, even if you’re not showing symptoms. Share your results with your sexual partners to ensure everyone is on the same page about health status. Having a medical report or knowing your partner’s recent test results is a way to build trust and reduce the risk of transmission.
Regular STI testing and sharing medical reports is key to practicing safe sex and preventing the spread of infections.
6. Pay attention to her responses
Being mindful of your partner’s reactions and comfort level is essential during any sexual activity. Make sure she’s enjoying herself and adjust your technique accordingly. Don’t be afraid to ask her what feels good and what she enjoys most. A responsive partner is likely to feel more relaxed and satisfied.
7. Avoid oral sex if there are open sores or cuts
If either partner has any cuts, sores, or visible signs of infection (such as cold sores, rashes, or lesions), it’s best to avoid oral sex until healing is complete. These sores can provide an entry point for infections and increase the risk of transmitting STIs.
8. Maintain good oral health
Oral health is just as important for the giver as it is for the receiver. Brushing and flossing regularly can help reduce the number of bacteria in your mouth, lowering the risk of oral infections and providing a cleaner, more pleasurable experience for your partner. Avoid oral sex if you have mouth sores or bleeding gums.
9. Respect boundaries and listen to your partner
Each person has their own preferences and limits. Respect your partner's boundaries and be responsive to her body language and feedback. If she asks you to stop, adjust, or change anything, do so immediately. Consent is ongoing, and checking in with her during the experience will ensure both of you feel safe and comfortable.
Respecting boundaries and being receptive to feedback fosters trust and makes for a more pleasurable and safe experience.
FAQ
What is cunnilingus?
Cunnilingus is the act of performing oral sex on a woman, specifically stimulating the vulva, clitoris, and vaginal area with the mouth, lips, and tongue. It’s a form of sexual activity that can enhance pleasure and intimacy, and many women enjoy it as it targets highly sensitive areas of the body.
Do all women enjoy oral sex?
Not all women have the same preferences when it comes to oral sex. Some women may enjoy it greatly, while others might not find it as pleasurable. Factors such as comfort, mood, physical sensitivity, and personal boundaries play a big role in whether a woman enjoys oral sex. Open communication with your partner is essential to understanding her preferences.
Is it possible to make a woman orgasm with clitoral stimulation alone?
Yes, many women can achieve orgasm through clitoral stimulation alone. The clitoris is one of the most sensitive parts of the female body, and direct or indirect stimulation can lead to intense pleasure and orgasm. However, every woman is different, and some may require additional types of stimulation, such as vaginal penetration or nipple play, to reach orgasm.
